The Paradoxes of Leadership: Early Learnings of a First-Time People Leader

By Dr. K. Yourie Kim

(2025 LYP Program Participant & Scholarship Winner)

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This year marks an important professional development milestone as I transition into a first-time people leader role and a new portfolio. In preparation for this shift, I had participated in the LYP Women’s Leadership & Career Development Program, which equips women in career transitions with strategic clarity, confidence, and community.

One program module that directly shaped my entry into this new role was on personal branding, e.g., What do I want to be known for? Through reflection and conversation with my cohort of diverse, ambitious women, I crystallized my goal of being a strong, kind, and thoughtful leader. These traits reflect both my personal and cultural values as an introverted and sensitive Korean-Canadian woman.

In the first two months in my new role, I’ve quickly realized that embodying this brand is more complex than I anticipated. I’m beginning to learn what is required to lead with strength, kindness, and thoughtfulness:

Being strong is being comfortable with ambiguity

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been told that one of my strengths is my attention to detail. As an introvert, I naturally seek deep understanding through careful deliberation, noting the nuances and intricacies of a situation. This has enabled me to produce accurate, well-organized, and thoughtful work. 

However, what made me a strong individual contributor is now being tested as a people leader, especially as I navigate a new portfolio. My world is suddenly filled with ambiguity as I ramp up on new projects and navigate new partnerships. Furthermore, with this ambiguity came a greater scarcity in time. I’ve quickly learned that I don’t always have the luxury of collecting all the inputs I need to make the “best” decision, even as the stakes feel higher because my decisions now affect my team, not just myself.

Leadership rarely comes with perfect information or unlimited time, and sometimes you won’t make the “best” decision. But as a manager once told me, there is always a way to solve a problem. What matters is making the call you believe is best, as inaction risks wasting time, while action, ironically, can provide the information needed to move forward more effectively.

Being clear is kind 

As a sensitive person, I’m highly attuned to others’ feelings and reactions, which helps me empathize with others. In Korean culture, there is a concept of nunchi, the ability to sense others’ moods to maintain social harmony. I often joke with my mother, a Korean immigrant, that when we watch an English-speaking film, she picks up on a characters’ intentions faster than I can due to her razor-sharp nunchi. While I can only aspire to her level, this is an ability I've learned to cultivate.

As a people leader, I’ve noticed I’m overindexing on my sensitivity. As the CHRO of my organization poignantly captured in a recent blog post: “Am I leading with this value, or hiding behind it?” Indeed, leadership requires clear feedback, decisions, and boundaries. With that clarity comes the risk of uncomfortable conversations, hurt feelings, and conflict, which are the very tensions I’m quickest to sense and most inclined to avoid.

But teams depend on their leaders for direction and growth. Without honest, firm dialogue, we risk misalignment, strained partnerships, and stagnation. I’m learning that avoiding the "unpleasant" isn't kindness; it’s a disservice. Real kindness is having the tough conversations, using my empathy not to avoid the truth, but to frame its delivery.

Being thoughtful is letting go of control

I take pride in being thoughtful. As a deep thinker, shaped by an Asian cultural emphasis on the collective good, I focus on ensuring others feel supported, included, and set up for success. I’m constantly thinking about ways to enhance a partnership or elevate the quality of an output.

In becoming a people leader, I’ve realized this quality can easily and unintentionally veer into overstepping. I’ve noticed an instinct to insert myself in things, to prescribe the process or deliverable so the team stays on track and in a good position. In my mind, this seems "thoughtful" by ensuring the team is delivering and supporting others in the best way. 

I’m learning that true thoughtfulness in leadership means creating space, not filling it. Even when I feel I have the answer, the more thoughtful choice is to step back, guiding the team with the right questions rather than the “right” solutions. By letting go of control, I’d be giving room for growth.

My transition to my new role this year has revealed the duality of my strengths. Building on the LYP program’s focus on balancing “overdone” with complementary strengths, I’m now experiencing the complex but important work of finding that balance in real-time. While the journey is ongoing, I’m energized by what I’ll learn next as I strive to lead with strength, kindness, and thoughtfulness.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Dr. Yourie Kim is a People Analytics leader at OMERS who turns data into insights that strengthen leadership and employee experience. She brings a research-driven, human-centered approach grounded in her PhD in Industrial-Organizational Psychology.